| Work work work |
[11 Jul 2008|01:39am] |
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music |
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Natasha Bedingfield {Love Like This} |
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I just got off work, and i am packed full of coffee cause APPEARENTLY the starbucks in Murrieta is open 24-7... they should not have told me that. Bad idea, but yeah i closed tonight made 120... not to shabby for a thursday.So yeah, thats pretty much my life as of today, still havent talked to my mother in over a week. Im gonna go see my daddy tomorrow and party with Tiffany for her birthday. Shall be totally fun. Yeah, thats it.
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| Fill me in |
[05 Jul 2008|11:22pm] |
I seemed to totally loose my LJ touch. A few questions:
How do i make my journal friends only?
Isnt there a way to keep myself logged in all the time?
I just hate logging in every time, its annoying
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| Internet |
[04 Jul 2008|11:43am] |
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I fianlly have internet in my apartment, you shall never get rid of me livejournal. NEVER!
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| The Verdict |
[29 Apr 2008|12:59pm] |
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music |
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Ferry Corston {Rock Your Body Rock} |
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I went to court just for them to postphoned it... yet again. I fucking hate our judicial system, they can fucking suck it. So yeah, now i have to go back in june. Totally gay. I woke up super late and literally put on pants and a shirt and ran out of the house to be there on time, I was actually 15 min late, but they hadnt called my name till after I got there. I was a complete wreck on the way there. Plus i looked like a got hit by a bus with my lack of make up and my last nights hairdo. didnt even brush it. lol. So sad. But yeah.... I guess we shall see what happens in June, hopefully this shit will finally be over.
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| Court Tomorrow |
[29 Apr 2008|02:05am] |
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mood |
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 blah |
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music |
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Goldfrap {Ooh La La} |
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So pretty much, the only reason I come back to Redlands anymore is to:
Spend an hour with my, (usually drunk) father
Spend time with my IMPORTANT friends. The rest could care less.
Let Chris show me the latest hilarious YouTube video
Spend WAY TOO MUCH time on myspace.
Get away from my (pathetic) mother
Sit and obsess over my ex.
Get really drunk... my favorite escape.
Then go to court... YAY
My life is pathetic. I have now realized that. Thank you livejournal... you helped me realize that.
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| Update |
[17 Apr 2008|08:54pm] |
So this is my yearly update
So many things have gone on this year that I dont even know where to begin. So I wont begin I will just tell you that yes... i am still alive. And pheebs I miss you dearly and you totally need to call me. As in like right now. NOW I SAID! But yeah
peace bitches
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[27 Dec 2007|04:19pm] |
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I miss you guys.... just stopping by to say im still alive
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[02 Aug 2006|11:30pm] |
Im very much finished with this phase of my life, this phase being: the hard part full of growing and confusion
This week has been murderous, and i would like for it to be over because i am done with not being happy, and not being satisfied, and being annoyed with everyone.
Ive picked up some old bad habits just cause it fucking makes me feel better. Fuck it. Were all just gonna die anyway.
I need a fucking friend.
Just a phase right?
Just nod you head.
-end-
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[12 Jul 2006|12:38pm] |
Last night i finally finished all of my FAFSA (financial aid) crap for school, it took like 2 hours dealing with my drunk mother, and practically doing her taxes all over again. But its fucking done, and now i just have to wait like 3 weeks.
The online registration thing says i can register today, which is odd cause i was supposed to do it tomorrow, then when i tried it says im missing paper work that i already submitted to them back in may. so my theory is that they just havent put it in their online data shit thing. So im just going to pray it will all be peachy by tomorrow morning.
Last night me and my father were bitching about how my mother is always at the bar and i was like "I need to learn how to drive before school starts." He said he will go out with me thursday and i think im going to tell aldo that we can see pirates later that way we can go again friday. *shrug* I have to get this shit done.
Well im gonna go get ready for work.
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| Daily update |
[10 Jul 2006|03:03pm] |
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I FINALLY GOT AHOLD OF THE COUNSELORS AT CRAFTON!!!!! And they said that a few people have called, and she got all my info and said she would call back.... which she did and totally told me that everything will be sorted out by the 13th so i can register like i had planned. Planned my class times i want, found out the cost of all this shit, and how i am going to work it out so i can afford it. Started all the financial aid stuffy stuff.
Tonights plan= bowling!!!!! The whole gang is going to the bowling alley! Which is sweet, except i suck very badly at bowling and i dont like Andrews girlfriend. haha, other than that though, Im excited! Whooooo! Bowling! but yeah, im gonna go get ready now, cause, i havent anything else to say.
{ ♥ }
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| Weekend |
[09 Jul 2006|10:43pm] |
So friday, was full of Saw and Saw II and mac n cheese.
Saturday, work, swimming in my clothes and drinking way to much bud light. Went to aldos house and played.
Suday woke up naked (its a phenomenon, i get naked when i drink to much.) and with a horrible headache. Ate some chorizo y huebos watched ITALY KICK ASS in the world cup. Went home at pizza, left for work, got off early and then went to Andrews house for a bbq celebracion por le cruise. Cause we finally paid for it and everything and it is all officail, and it gave us an excuse to drink. had a few Beam and Cokes aldo took me home, and here i am on a computer telling you about it.
Isnt life grand?
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| Fridays are lame |
[07 Jul 2006|12:56pm] |
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mood |
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Clean |
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music |
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Panic! At The Disco |
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Mainly cause i have no one to hang out with during the day. Today I went swimming though, which was neat... i guess. Then ive been trying to spend the rest of the day getting ahold of Crafton cause they fucked up on my registration date. Which will fuck me over to the max. But noooooooo their lines are all busy. So finally i just left a message and I shall hope and pray that they will fix this shit... bastards.
The plan for tonight: unknown.
We will probably end up watching movies and his house, maybe play some pikmen. who knows.
And there is your update my lovelys!
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| That is OH SO intresting |
[28 Feb 2006|06:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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Fucked. Possibly in the ass. |
] |
So basically this day was just anoyingly lame. Although the weather was nice and cloudy and it rained this morning which was a little bit of a pleasant change.
This day dragged and it seemed as the hours passed I just became more depressingly pessimistic. Then when Manda dropped me off at home we sat in her car for 2 hours discussing the finer and lower points of sex and boyfriends and everyhting in the whole situation. I told her all of my doubts and feeling and with my pessimisticness and her optimism we got absolutely no where. And I am no more at peace with myself than I was before. But it was very nice to have someone to talk to and it seems as though at least once a month we have one of those weird spill-all conversations. Its nice, in some way.
Ever since I quit smoking I have gained a lot of weight and all I do anymore is eat. It sucks and makes me want to start again but, I dont want to end up totally fucked in the ass when Im older. But I dont plan on living long enough to feel the consequences.
Have you noticed everyday I write the exact same thing I did yesterday... my life is that repetitive.
I found out that my "raver birthday" which is the anniversary on your first rave [ie; my first rave was Return to Candyland-last april and Candyland 3 is on april first] is comming up soon. So I have to go, even though I promised that I would only go to massives and I am living on an extremely tight budget. So that was basically the highlight of my day. All I want right now is to sleep. Im so lazy and fat and pathetic.
Today I quoted ESotSM.
I'm just a fucked up girl looking for a peace of mind
It fit with my mood.
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| Sorry sorry sorry |
[27 Feb 2006|02:29pm] |
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mood |
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 blank |
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music |
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Bohemian like you (I wish I had this CD) |
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I am so sorry I dont update a lot anymore. Its like I can never find the time. It is absolutely horrible and I cant apologize enough for it.
So lets see, I have been working a lot latley. Cause I need the money. Well, less need more want. So between school and work I dont do much else except try to have fun. So I am saving to go on a cruise to mexico next october. Which should be totally fun. 7 day cruise, I am very excited! I shall be 18 by then. So that is really effecting the whole money situation. I havent been going to raves as much lately, I dont really have the money, but I am going to a mini massive in march, called How Sweet It Is, and it will be at the shrine auditorium, which is an awesome venue and I shall not miss that one. So there is 40 bucks right there, and the cruise is about 6 hundred, and I only have 250 left to pay it off, then I have to get a 20 dollar ID card, to get my $100 passport, THEN there is a 2 day music festical called Coachella out in Indio california and my boyfriend really wants me to go, and we are going to camp out, if I can get permission from my parents and a lot of awesome bands are going to be there, including: Depeche Mode, Franz Ferdinand, Yeah Yeah Yeah's, Tool, Sleater Kiney (phoebe said they are great!) and Coheed and Cambria and and and and and EXCITMENT! So yeah, that is like 160 right there. All one a 400 dollar a month budget, it is quite expensive but it will all be so much fun!!!! I am very excited. I have been picking up shifts and I should become a server in june/july ish so there is a little bit more cash.
But then there is the reality portion on life. Last week my grandmother was officially diagnosed with breast cancer, and this week we shall find out if it is curable or not. Its hard, but I have been preparing for her passing for quite some times. Ive been kinda depressive at times. I very upset with myself. Appearance wise, I dont think I am very...appealing. For lack of a better word. I need to looks some weight and since I have quit smoking I have gained... quite a few pounds. But I have quit for about a month and going strong. Bu this extra weight is absolutly smothering my self-esteem, but in the long run I know its better if I quite, but I just dont plan on living that long. 24. The effects of smoking usually dont get too bad until around 40-50... so I will die at least 15 years before itll kill me. But still, go me! Also I havent done E since the beginning of Feb, so again with the GO ME! Being clean is fun.... sometimes. I still drink, but no beer cause that will get me even fatter. I dont know, I guess im just really disgusted with myself. It sucks being a teen. Yanno, im going to quit before I drive myself to smoke again. But I quit and um.... YAY!
Love ya'll!
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| Have a happy new year!!!! |
[31 Dec 2005|09:57am] |
Everyone!!!!
Have a great new year!!!!!!!!! Its been lots of fun reading/getting to know you and whatnot so yeah! Love you all!!! Muahs!!!
♥ Nikki
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| Holy shit dude |
[02 Dec 2005|06:31pm] |
Okay, you know the livejournal homepage? www.livejournal.com
Yeah well when I fist saw Frank going "baaaaaah humbug" I SERIOUSLY belted out a huge HAH!
I found it amusing.
I am easily amused.
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| *waves* HIYA POODLE! |
[15 Nov 2005|04:07pm] |
| You Passed 8th Grade Science | 
Congratulations, you got 8/8 correct! |
I still read guys! I just never post. Im a very busy and yet lazy child.
But I still read guys! I still love you!
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[01 Oct 2005|10:03pm] |
Oh livejournal, how I seriously have missed my rantings on this site
Im in a very bad mood and I want is for someone to slit my throat cause I dont have the balls to do it myself. I am just pissed off and I havent been like this in fucking forever I would give anything to fight or just get in a really bad argument with ANYONE at this point. I am sick, I cant leave my house because i can barely fucking breather and Im being replaces by fat sluts everywhere I turn. Jrs new little girlfriend is a drug addict fat bitch and so it Katie the chick I work with... they both need to just choke on their own herpes and die. Fuck nice. I dont do nice. I do, shut the fuck up. I hate being replaced by stupid people. I know I am a better person. But when I get looked over and replaced for something else that I see as being much much worse. I realize maybe Im not good enough, How dare someone make me feel like im not good enough and I dont like the fact that someone can do this to me. I am not completely in control of how I feel. I dislike people at the moment and if I thought crying would help I would cry a mother fucking river. But nothing helps you just have to wait
I hate waiting
I dont want to wait to see what will happen I want to stop feeling pissed and I want to make you understand how fucked up I really am cause I am sick of faking fucking happy
then I just have these weird mental break downs where nothing gets me back up and I dont fucking want this shit
I want to be normal
but I dont want to conform to this fucked up world and its fucked up standards and morals and values
fuck all that
I dont want it
but at the same time it makes it so much easier
its easier to be happy all the time and joke around and not have anything to worry about
but its fake and i dont like being fake cause generally I am NOT i repeat NOT a fake person, usually if I dont like somethin you will know it but these people, all of these people make you conform to their bullshit standards and I just say fuck you
fuck all of them
and that makes me feel better
for that time
until i have my mother fucking mental breakdown with the crying and the breaking things and whats it all for?
attention
I will blatenly say it
I need someone to care
I really really do
I need someone who is there everyday in my life to say they need it
they need me
and its never goingt to fucking happen
so fuck all of it
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| Great start! |
[07 Sep 2005|12:05pm] |
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mood |
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Sick lyke whoa |
] |
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music |
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Jack Johnson {Never Know} |
] |
So today is the second day of school and I am home sick. Seriously, I feel as though I might die. So needless to say my mother is extremely pissed off. Its not really my fault im sick butI really cant afford to miss school. I am supposed to work tonight to. But I dont know if my mother will let me go. I should call her and find out. I dont really want to cause I feel like shit, but I feel bad cause I only have 3 shifts and it looks bad if I miss one. Ugh, I fucking hate school already. Thats just fucking pathetic.
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| I am fucking back bitches! |
[05 Sep 2005|10:33pm] |
I have been gone for tons of months and i have had tons of fun. If you havent deleted me as a friend I love you. If you have im going to try and add you again. So sorry I didnt tell you sooner. I love you all and i have many things to do so...
ta ta for now!
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